Samantha has to nip out to take her German Shepherd to the park to give him a stroke while he licks her face and pants.
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Samantha has got to go off early to meet an entomologist friend who's been showing her his collection of winged insects. They've already covered his bees and wasps and tonight she's hoping to go through his flies.
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Samantha tells us she's off to a gourmet evening where her favourite French chef has prepared a nine course dinner. Looking at the menu, she says she's not so keen on some of his traditional dishes, but she spotted something tempting between the frogs legs.
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Samantha has to nip out to the House of Lords with her constituency friend. He's looking for support for his MP who's facing expulsion, and Samantha says it's important to have a good peer if his member's likely to be out.
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Samantha tells me she's had to nip out to meet a nice chap who's training her in computer skills. Tonight she hopes he's going to show her the 3 1/2 inch floppy he's got in his Mac.
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Samantha has to nip off to the National Opera where she's been giving private tuition to the singers. Having seen what she did to the baritone, the director is keen to see what she might do for a tenor.
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Samantha tells me she's off with a team of local paramedics this evening. They're so excited at the thought, they just can't wait for her to arrive so they can get their ambulance and stretcher out for the night.
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Samantha has to nip off now as she's selling her seaside apartment. She tells me she's got a man coming round who's keen to inspect her flat out on the beach.
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Samantha has to nip off now as her plumber is sending round the man who does the annual safety test on her gas boiler, which always gives her great peace of mind. She says it's good to feel the plumber's tester calls at regular intervals.
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Samantha has to nip off now to meet her constituency chairman for a trip to the house, as she says his member's going up for an all night session.
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Samantha tells me she has to nip off now as she's auditioning as an extra in The Bill. She's really looking forward to that: according to the script her character gets fingered by the fuzz.
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Samantha has to nip out now as she's just heard that her gentlemen's outfitter friend has won salesman of the year. She's keen to rush over and surprise him with a big kiss in the trouser department, where he's been 'specially outstanding.
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Samantha has nip out to meet a yachting friend who's a bit down in the dumps and stuck indoors. She says he's not been feeling himself lately, so she's going to get him out in her little boat. When she feels there's a swell on she'll know his pecker's up again.
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Samantha has to go now as she's off to meet her Italian gentleman friend who's taking her out for an ice cream. She says she likes nothing better than to spend the evening licking the nuts off a large Neapolitan.
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Our resident IT expert, Samantha, tells me she has to nip out to meet a young man who's having problems configuring his new PC. She says he's just called to say his zip is down, his floppy keeps popping out and he feels he needs more bytes on it.
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Samantha tells me she has to nip out to the local golf course where she's caddying for a nice old gentleman. She's learnt all about the different types of club and she says if he gets stuck in an awkward lay she'll pull out his wood and nibblet.
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Samantha's just started keeping bees and already has three dozen or so. She says she's got an expert handler coming round to give a demonstration. He'll carefully take out her 38 bees and soon have them flying round his head.
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Samantha has to nip out to meet a nice old colonel who's promised to show her his parade ground, and might even let her inspect his privates.
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Samantha has to nip off to the coast now for a spot of lobster fishing with some lads on their boat. They never forget where they dropped their pots 'cause it's where Samantha tossed a large buoy over the side.
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Samantha tells me she has to nip out now as she's been invited to an exclusive club to meet a group of aristocrats. She's very excited to see where all the big knobs hang out. She says at such a posh function she and the other girls will probably end up trying to speak with plums in their mouths.
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Samantha is a qualified croupier and often works at an exclusive Soho club where gamblers pay top money to pay roulette all day and poker all night.
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Samantha has to nip out now as she is off to her evening class where the baking instructor is going to assess her efforts. Last week he popped her bread rolls straight into his mouth and he's promised to try her muffin next week
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Samantha is off on a tour of the Lake District with a naturist gentleman friend who wants to strip off at Keswick and Cockermouth.
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Samantha is off on a dinner date with a gentleman friend from Moscow who's brought over a variety of caviars and an array of vodka-based aperitifs. She says he's going to offer her delicious food in his hotel room and then liquor out on the balcony.
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Samantha tells me she has to nip off now as her trusted aged gardener is coming round to identify the mysterious trailing plant that's growing in her privet. Obviously she's keen not to miss him if there's a chance she may have an Old Man's Beard in her bush.
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Samantha tells me she has to nip out now as she has a cookery lesson with her new chef gentleman friend, who's been teaching her cake decoration. He has all sorts of professional kitchen equipment, and as Samantha is having trouble keeping enough pressure on her icing dispenser for complete coverage, he's promised to show her how to squeeze his hard on to the top of the cake.
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Samantha tells me she has to go now as she's off to the country residence of her new gentleman friend, who has some interesting birds in the thicket. He keeps a young chicken, but Samantha says there are also wild breeds there, and she can't wait to see his Woodcock, Pullet and Swallow.
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Samantha tells me she has to nip out now as she's off to see her personal trainer for a fitness demonstration. She says she's looking forward to him showing how he gets the fat down and pounds off in front of her.
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Samantha is something of a keen horse woman, and she tells me that she's off to see a trainer who's offered her the chance of a couple of races he wants her to contest. She's quite excited, as he's prepared to drop his jockeys to enter her at Newmarket.
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Samantha tells me that she has to nip off to a special Welsh Conservative Association dinner for their most senior MP, who's name is said to be almost impossible to pronounce. She's certainly found the longest standing Welsh member a bit of a mouthful.
Submitted by Gillie
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